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I have so much to write,
I don't know where to begin.

Had a dream last night.
That I was back in Sydney for studies.
Not exactly deja vu,
for the place and situation were different.
But the affect was oh so familiar.

Perhaps the 11pm drama serial on channel 8 has brought on some memories.
Sydney Fish Market, Taronga Zoo, Hunter Valley,
Pancakes on the Rocks, Queen Victoria Building,
Bondi, Newtown, Hoochie Mama, Nandos...
All these venues, lit so much remembrances.
Can't say for sure they were happy ones, nor forlorn.
However they do make a heart heavy.

Last year, this time, I never thought
I would be able to open the door to my heart to someone else again.
My vision and thoughts revolved around a single individual...
The number 23, Pixel Chix, Starburst,
caramelised onions, eggs benedict, shar pei pups, Tamiya...
Just to name a few; the attributes were abundant.

I used to question myself...
Why did God give onto others what I couldn't have?
I was willing to do and give even more just to regain what I've lost.
I worked so so hard, in the attempt to recover that defunct love.
But through the ordeal, I've learnt that timing accounts for entirety.
No matter what actions are rendered,
they will be proven futile if the instances are not right.
You can execute the most romantic and quixotic plan in this whole world,
nevertheless, it will be fruitless should the recipient rejects it.
Not because the opposite party doesn't appreciate it, nor stop feeling for you,
but for the mere yet substantial reason - the person's not ready for acceptance.

The good ole reminiscences...
I need to say goodbye to.
Forgetting them,
would be a fabrication I shouldn't do.
For they were, after all,
once a lovely chapter of my life.
It's time to build a whole new archive of nostalgia.
A creation of fabuloso muse, here I come with vive.

JM, I wish you well.
*smiles warmly*

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